A Poem

Let go of that which no longer serves you.

Leave the past in the past.

All you have is here and now.

A chance to begin anew.

A chance to start afresh.

That which has hurt you before,

Can no longer do so.

Release it. Release it. Let it go.

Embrace each day for the opportunities

And wonder that comes with it.

Allow yourself to be fully present in each moment.

Fill your heart, your mind, your body and your spirit with love.

Let it flow freely from your being,

Spreading out into the world,

Making a difference where ever you go.

Fill your heart with light,

Shine your beacon on the dark spaces,

For we all have dark spaces;

That aren’t quite as scary when we allow the light to shine it.

Take this moment and make it yours.

Treasure it.

Honour it.

Do with it what you like.

All you have is here and now

And what you do

Is entirely up to you.

Shanelle Schick 2016

The Key to Love Lies Within You

I am sitting here on a rainy cold Sunday, knitting away (my current project is a mermaid tail blanket for my daughter) listening to Marianne Williamson's e-book "A Return to Love" while the rows are passing me by. Hearing her talk about love, reminded me that a few years ago, I wrote down some musings on my thoughts on love, which I will share with you in a moment.

The profound thing is, that the words I wrote those years ago are pretty much on par with what she is saying in her audio-book. Talk about a goosebump moment. We are wiser than we are lead to believe. We are wiser than we let ourselves believe. Trust that you know what is right for you.

Anyhow, here are the musings that I had:

"Love is what brings us here, what puts our feet on the earth.

Love is what connects us to our family, our friends, our lovers, our souls, our purpose, ourselves. Love unites us with ourselves and others.

Love nourishes and nurtures us, encourages us to grow, protects us as children.

Love breeds love.

Where is the lesson taught that love for who you are is the most important kind of love? Where are we shown to love ourselves, to give to ourselves, to cherish ourselves, to nourish, to nurture, to accept, to believe, to trust, to inspire within before we seek it from elsewhere?

Where are we shown that all that we have is a reflection of who we are?

Where is the school teaching us that emotions are fabulous and are capable of connecting us with ourselves and others? And that it’s okay to display these openly and honestly, no need for holding back or holding onto our truest feelings?

Where are we shown that love is beautiful, kind, passionate, forgiving, challenging, rewarding, tenacious, light, heavy, invigorating, mesmerising, defining, peaceful, easy, relaxed, exciting, vibrant, soulful, naked, imperfect, honest, raw, truth, desire?

How do we learn to love? How are we taught how to define love? We all have our own unique versions, definitions, rules, regulations and expectations when it comes to love. Why is it expected to come to us? Why do we seek it out, search for it, long for it, ache for it, compromise for it, lust after it? Why do we need love from outside to complete who we are? Why does it come easy for some and yet eludes others? Is it a matter of expectations and levels of satisfaction? Are they different in each of us? How do you know when you’ve arrived at love? What does it look like, feel like, sound like? Why are we taught love is difficult, challenging, worth fighting for?

Love is beautiful.
Love is raw.
Love is vulnerable.
Love is sweet.
Love is bitter.
Love is warm.
Love is connection.
Love is cuddly.
Love is intense.
 Love is tender.
Love is kind.
Love is mushy.
Love is luminescent.
Love is pure.
Love is simple.
Love is evolution.
Love is beautiful.
Love is inspirational.
 Love is projection.
Love is wondrous.
 Love is amazing.
Love is awesome.
 Love is plentiful.
 Love is limitless.
Love is flowing.
Love is vibrant.
Love is colourful.
 Love is within.

What if you are love? Who you are. What you do. What you bring into this world; the way you live your life, the way you embrace others, the way you face your fears, the way you conquer your own inner battles. What if love is you? What if you are love in the form of bliss, desire, passion, abundance, connection, vulnerability, rawness, devotion, wholeheartedness, acceptance, gratitude, peace, flow, vibrancy, tenderness, inspiration, enough, appreciation, wonder, fulfilment, expansion, evolution, imperfection, rawness, honesty, truth, beauty, emotions, free flowing, effervescence, flexibility?

 Life would be a series simpler, straightforward, uncomplicated, humming, peaceful, ebbing, flowing, rippling, streaming, gushing and rolling experiences, with one common denominator – love. If the world came from a place of love, rather than the lack mentality there is the moment, there would be enough for everyone, we would be happy with who we are and what we have, we would be peaceful, calm, relaxed, we would be grateful and appreciative, and we would be content. We would be enough."  

I am sure there are many more things to learn about love. My greatest learning so far is that first we must love ourselves in order to love others and to receive love. More to come on this topic!

The Story that Still Chokes Me Up Unexpectedly

This morning I had a phone interview with a journalist from a magazine that is doing a feature on PND.

It doesn't matter how many times I share my story, there are still days when it gets me. Some days I get taken right back to that place and those feelings and I get a bit choked up. While I realise just how far I have come since those dark days, at times there is still an element of guilt that comes into play.

I know cannot undo what has been done. I can simply use my experience to share with others to help them feel less alone and to realise that PND is more "normal" than what we're led to believe. If through the process of me sharing helps just one other person, then that is enough.

Having this reaction also makes me realise how passionate I am about supporting mums and dads on this rocky and unfamiliar road of parenthoodand how important it is that we learn to put our emotional health and wellbeing at the forefront.

It's time for it to be okay for us to share how we are really feeling on the inside. It's time to take away the mask we've been wearing for society's sake, because that's all just a facade any way.

Being a parent is a tough gig, it's unlike anything we've experienced before, but it shouldn't have to be a journey we walk alone.

I will continue to share my story, for it's bigger than me. It no longer defines who I am. It's a part of the tapestry of life I continue to weave.

Big love to you! heart emoticon

If you are not feeling great about things at the moment, then I encourage you to reach out and talk to someone. And if someone reaches out to share how they're feeling with you, please don't try to fix it, just listen with the intent to hear what they are saying. This is the best thing you can do 

Seven Year Switch

I have a confession to make ... I totally got sucked into watching "Seven Year Switch". Last night was the last episode of the experiment where the couples decided if they were going to stay together or to split.

I sat watching it like one would watch an impending train crash, unable to look away. I couldn't believe that at the end of it all, the amount of blame that was being placed on the other partner (in most of the relationship scenarios) nor the conditions that were surrounding them staying together.

When did love become a bargaining tool?
When did it become "If you do this, the way I like it, the way I think is right, then I will love you?"
When did love become so conditional?

No one was taking any responsibility for themselves and their behaviour. It was still such a blame game. I'm not quite sure what they learned during the course of the experiment or perhaps it's just what the producer chose to show us as a reflection of the experiment - who knows.

Some things I have learned about love and relationships (and am continuing to learn, as it's a process and a journey, not a start/finish point and am by no means an expert in this area)

* Love starts, happens and finishes with you
* The quality of the relationship you have with yourself will determine the quality of all other relationships in your life
* Real Love is limitless and unconditional
* You cannot rely on someone else to fulfill a need within you that you are not prepared to work on and mend for yourself first
* That which you see in your partner (positive and negative attributes) are a direct reflection of what you are able to see within yourself. So if you are constantly whinging and complaining about your partner, perhaps it's time to take a closer look in the mirror.
* Quality communication is fundamental in all relationships
* Nothing has meaning except for the meaning which we choose to give it

Big love to you all, wherever you are and whatever you are doing today heart emoticonheart emoticon

Take My Hand ...

A little poem popped into my head and wanted to be written and shared. xx

Take my hand awhile, place it in yours.

Let me know I am safe.

Allow me to feel your warmth.

Stay close by my side, even when I push you away.

Clear the path for me to walk.

Allow me to follow my heart and to explore.

May you give me comfort in my time of need.

While gently reminding me it's really all inside of me.

Show me glimpses of what I can be.

Spark my inspiration and light my creative fire.

Let me know that I am really enough.

And that I can make it through

All of life's "big" stuff.

Village Building for Mums

We've heard that it takes a village to raise a child. It's also important for a mother (especially a new mother) to have the nurturing and support of a village too.

When I had PND, no one in my village understood what it was like to have a mental illness associated with motherhood. I felt guilt and shame because I wasn't "normal". There was no one to open up to about what was really going on for me.

I can almost guarantee that if someone in my village had known about the signs to look for or how to support someone with PND, then my journey wouldn't have been so isolating.

If someone else in my village had a lived experience of living and coping with a mental illness as a new mum, someone - a go-to that I could have talked to about my real feelings and how I wasn't coping, then I wouldn't have tried to hide from it for as long as I did.

Peach Tree Perinatal Wellness is the bridge into a Mum's village. When's she not coping as a mother. When she's challenged by her mental health. When she's overwhelmed with the entire deal of motherhood. Our Peachy Parents Groups are building strong villages of support for mums. They provide a place to speak opening and honestly, without judgement. A place where friendships are formed and deep breaths are taken as mums realise they're not on their own and they are not alone in their experiences.

Peach Tree Perinatal Wellness is a not for profit organisation who rely on fundraising efforts and securing grants to support our Peachy Parents Groups and our Parent Education Programs. We may not have the big shiny name or reputation (yet) of other charities, however the work we carry out in our communities has a huge impact not only on the mums engaging in our services, but the children, partners and families too.

Having said that, I encourage you to take a moment to make a small contribution to a very worthwhile cause who doesn't have the ability to promote ourselves in flashing neon lights. Our annual Peach Tree Trek is on next Sunday 1st May in Brisbane, one of our biggest fundraising efforts for the year. Even $5 will make the biggest difference to the villages we are building and will help us to expand them to reach more families who can benefit from having Peach Tree in their lives.