Monday, 19 May 2014

How to Autograph Curveballs

Sometimes in life, you're just cruising along, taking it easy, getting from A to B and then something happens to jolt you back to reality - a curveball is thrown in your path from left or right field you can't really tell because it all happens so quickly. This is exactly what I was faced with a few weeks back.

There I was, driving back into town from a meeting to pick up my daughter and do a few jobs before returning home for lunch and heading out together for an appointment. My plan didn't quite pan out that way however. The universe had other plans. It unleashed a driver on the same road at the same time as me.

A driver who was so focused on the love of her life being on the other side of the road, she wasn't looking where she was going and wasn't aware I was in front of her and that she needed to stop at the roundabout. There was a car in front of me and thankfully I didn't hit them.

As I was shunted from behind by the loved-up driver, the words "WTF" flew out of my mouth automatically. Somehow I managed to pull over safely and get out of the car to investigate the damage. In the scheme of things, a new tailgate on the car was a small price to pay. It could have been worse, much worse. After all Miss 4 has been telling us it's time for a new car, even though this one is not yet 12 months old!

I took myself off to the hospital to be checked out, just as a precaution. I felt fine, but wanted to make sure Baby Phillips was okay too. In accident & emergency I was cleared to go home. However I was due for my ante-natal appointment that afternoon and the midwife said she wanted to see me before I left.

When the A & E Nurse told me I could go, luckily I insisted on seeing the midwife! I was sent over to ante-natal and put on the CTG machine to be monitored for an hour. The CTG was picking up mild contractions, so I needed to stay and be monitored for 4 hours. A note to all the mums-to-be out there - any kind of car accident requires that you be monitored by CTG for at least a 3 hour period.

The contractions weren't painful. But they were regular - coming every 10 - 15 mins with intensity. As I lay there in the stark white room my mind started to wander down the "what if" path. Then I realised that I was playing scenarios through my mind that I didn't need to. I started focussing on the outcome of delivering a happy, healthy baby at full-term, as opposed to there and then at 31 weeks.

I remembered I had downloaded some relaxation music on my phone, so I pulled this out and started to play it. As I listened, I breathed deeply and focused on my desired outcome. Surprisingly enough, the contractions slowed down and then stopped altogether. Finally I was able to go home to my own bed. I was exhausted, yet pleased that I didn't need to be sent to the larger hospital in the area. I would go back the next morning just to check things were okay and if the contractions came back that night, I was to take myself to hospital immediately.

There were a few lessons learned that I'd like to share with you in the hope that when you're faced with a curveball situation, may help you get through a little easier:


  • Not everything is about you, sometimes things just happen
  • No matter how carefully you plan, there will always be obstacles in your path
  • Take responsibility for you and your actions (it can be so easy to  blame others and go into 'victim' mode)
  • Manage your mental state - focus on the outcome you want from the situation , rather than getting caught up in the drama of the moment
  • Wherever you go, make sure you take some relaxation/meditation music because you never know when you may need it!
  • If in doubt remember to breathe - DEEPLY

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